Something very odd has been going on with Randy Quaid and his wife, Evi.
The 60 year old actor and his wife have been on the run for some time now, with the public very curious as to why the beloved actor, famous for his "Cousin Eddie" character from the National Lampoon's Vacation series, would be doing such a thing.
But finally- after being arrested a month ago in Canada for being in the country illegally and formally requesting that the country grant he and his wife asylum- the couple has appeared publicly to talk about their very odd and unbelievable situation.
Appearing on Monday's episode of Good Morning America, the actor and his wife told the world that they are the subject of assassination attempts by a cabal of mysterious "Celebrity Whackers" that will stop at nothing short of the two dead.
A different kind of "Star Whacker"...
Due in a California court on Tuesday November 2, 2010 in order to face charges of squatting and wrecking their home in Santa Barbara, California, the couple claims that they are on the run from a group of celebrity assassins that have made attempts on their lives.
"I genuinely feel these people are trying to kill us," Evi Quaid said. "We are refugees … We are Hollywood refugees."
Denying that either he or his wife are either on drugs or completely insane, Randy Quaid went on to say:
"They follow us, they tail us... They tag our phones, they hack our computers..."
He goes on:
"We're not faking it. We're confronting it."
Wait... it gets better...
The one time Oscar nominee went on to allege that it was "... very possible that Heath Ledger could have been murdered" by the group, which he said is seeking to make cash by assassinating celebrities.
"It's possible for people to gain control of every facet of your life," he said.
Added Evi Quaid: "They are businessmen. It's the mafia. It's organized crime."
Wow... celebrity assassins bumping off celebrities for yet to be determined reasons in order to inexplicably make some sort of money out of it...
I will give him this much... it is certainly original...
I have heard of celebrities blaming everything -from bouts with the demon whiskey to traumas inflicted by the wandering hands of an overly affectionate uncle- in order to try and excuse antisocial behavior...
But never has the idea of the behavior being the byproduct of evading assassination from shady underworld types (that have killed before mind you) been offered.
And as much as I really want to give "Cousin Eddie" and his broad the benefit of the doubt on this one (not to mention how fucking cool I think it would be if there really was some mysterious organization of celebrity killing mobsters that have some elaborate insurance scheme worked out with the production companies where some of these washed up actors might be worth more dead than alive), I really do not see how this is even remotely possible.
Personally I think that Randy and his wife lost all the Vacation and Independence Day money during the recent economic crash (or maybe he was heavily invested with Bernie Madoff). Combine that with an inability to continue to earn (while his better looking and more talented brother continues to get big money work) and I am sure that would be enough to send anyone a little off the edge.
Sadly though, unless he and his wife suffer an unfortunate accident where they manage to shoot each other in the back of the head of fall chest first into a hunting knife or find some other tragic end to their story, they will forever be seen as lunatics desperate to avoid judgment for crimes they committed in California.
Not too shocked though... dude always did look a tad bit unbalanced.