Thom Acee looks into the Future...

THOM-ACEEAt the end of the year, it is customary for websites (as well as other publications) to get a hold of a local gypsy or soothsayer and have her take a glance into the ethers of time to see what the future might hold for us, as a people.  So when my partners in this little endeavor came to me and suggested that maybe we do an article like that, it didn't strike me as odd.

So we put out word throughout the land calling to all gypsies, soothsayers, and seers to try and find one who would be willing to do just such a thing for The Weekly Constitutional (who, thanks to its loyal readers is now a website of note, as opposed to just the project of a couple of potheads hanging out in a poorly ventilated garage).

Only we ran into a problem that we could have never have foreseen...

fortuneTurns out we could not have been wronger about our theory that it was possible to say whatever we wanted to about gypsies because of the limitations that life in a wooden wagon hopping from town to town with the traveling show ("traveling show", we have learned, is in fact an ancient gypsy word for "crime wave") can cause to one's ability to access the internet ( Also, we might have underestimated their literacy rates...) because every time we asked a gypsy to make predictions for the site, we were rejected (of course, maybe I should not have started out all my conversations with them by universally calling them all "Esmeralda").

Either way, the site still needed its predictions so a solution had to be divined...

And divine one I did...

 

The Great Shamanistic Journey

shamanic-journey

The idea came to me while listening to an episode of Coast to Coast a few weeks ago.  The guest on that episode, "New Age" thinker Daniel Pinchbeck, was talking about how ancient shaman would seek the aid of hallucinogens in order to go on "Spirit Journeys" into the astral realms in order to seek cures for illnesses, answers to questions, and even to try and take a peek at the future (usually given in the form of "visions", though it is said that sometimes there are spoken messages.

And that got me thinking.

samanFor years, the shamanic practices had been of some interest to me and I had done a good bit of research into the matter.  I also have been a student of yoga for a few years now and meditate on an almost daily basis.

I was also familiar with the works of men like Daniel Pinchbeck and Terrance McKenna, which claimed that it is possible for the human mind to access the living consciousness of the universe (the astral plain if you will) through the use of mind altering substances, such as psilocybin mushrooms, LSD, and DMT.

so I decided that in order to get that glimpse into the future that my article so desperately needed, I was going to have to do something incredibly brave (or incredibly foolish, depending on your perspective)...

I would go on my own shamanic journey using the aid of hallucinogens in order to gain access to the living consciousness of the universe and see if it would be possible to catch a glimpse into the "World of Tomorrow". 

There and back again...

Ezekiel-Vision-Merkaba

I researched the idea for a little bit... not just to see if there were any inherent risks to exposing myself to the otherworldly Freshly-Picked-Shroomsplains but also to see what I could expect on my journey.  And the whole idea seemed easy enough... cleanse the area (both physically and spiritually), burn a few sanctifying incenses in order to set the proper mood, light a candle, begin my meditative process and- in the immortal words of Tim Leary- "tune in and drop out".

The biggest warnings I came across during all my research was that in order for this whole thing to work I would have to make sure that my intentions were good (as negative intentions would draw to me negative sprits that would do me physical and spiritual harm.

tools-ofthe-tradeI gathered the things my research had suggested I have in order to make sure that I have created a space conducive for such an experiment:

A few candles for light, my "spirit guide" totem (he goes by "Johnny" and gets rather annoyed with my greenness),  a drum to help me keep beat, and some sage to burn.

Merkabah-AglaOh, and the mushrooms that would- when ingested- become my merkabah into conversations with the Ancient spirits to see if they can shed some light on the coming events of 2011.

Over the course of four weeks, I conducted this experiment; spending the majority of the week making sure that my mind was in the right place and formulating the questions I would need to ask and actually going on the "journey" at the end of the week.


The Visions of 2011

**Usually I do try and keep things light with my articles, but the visions I received were actually rather ominous (granted, it could have very well been due just as much to my month long disaster movie marathon as it was to the visions of the future...).  The following was written while conducting the "experiment".  It is broken up into four sections, one for each of the sessions I underwent.  Do not try this at home...**

lotr-crystalball

i

For the United States, continued financial troubles will hamper the Nation during the first two quarters.

 There will be food riots in Mexico, and in Asia.

 Drought in China will lead to civil unrest and food riots later in the year.

 Crude Oil will cost 150/barrel y summer, raising the price of gasoline in the States to well over three bucks a gallon.  This will stall whatever economic recovery happened to get going on at the time.

ii

Tensions in the Middle East will continue to grow as Iran moves closer to achieving their goals for creating an atomic weapon.  Look for an Israeli strike to the nation around Labor Day. 

The saber rattling between north and South Korea will continue to heighten. But it will not end in war.  Look for Kim Jung Il's son to be disposed of in a very quiet coup de tat by high ranking military generals tired of being at the whim of mad men.

The war in Afghanistan will become bloodier as the American installed government loses the favor of the people once stories about the widespread corruption of the current government begins to be a useful tool for the Taliban warlords trying to regain their power.

President Obama will see his popularity reach new lows, as will the newly elected Republican congress as American citizens become disillusioned with the current state of affairs in Washington DC.

iii

Europe will continue to have civil unrest due to their crippled national economies.  Greece, Ireland, and England- already seeing such violent expressions of outrage- will see dramatic demonstrations in the streets that will get out of hand.  Look for the debt crisis to also affect the stability of the European Union as more well off nations begin to resent the fates of their people being bound to the fats of less well off ones.

 Not really a prediction, but I keep getting a strange feeling about something happening in the Pakistan/India area. Not sure what but something... just kind of got that feeling.

 A male A List celebrity will due surprisingly late in 2011.

There will be an increase in UFO sightings, including a very public one in a major European city in the first four months of the year.

Look for something devastating to occur in Moscow by midyear.

iv

Examples of civil unrest will start to show in the US as well. Major cities hard hit by the crippled economy will boil over with outrage and anger during the hot summer months.

A major earthquake will hit St. Louis in the fall.

Sarah Palin will not run for the Presidency in 2012.

The winter will be especially brutal for North America.  Crippling blizzards will strike well into February in places where such weather isn't to be expected.

These are a few "human interest" answers I divined so it wasn't just a depressing list of doomsaying...

The Atlanta Falcons will win the Super Bowl.

Christopher Nolan will win the Oscar for "Best director" but The Social Network will take home the "Best Picture" award.

Lady Gaga will dispel all the rumors about her being a hermaphrodite by announcing to the world that she is pregnant in the late summer.